I forgot how hot balto sounded
My birth control alarm gets more depressing every night.
i've already watched her fall off the steps, walk up on our porch and try to dance with the dog, and stumble across the street to stand outside the neighbors window...is it taking it too far to watch this rando girl and some guy have sex behind our parking lot now?
She kept chasing him yelling thief, because he drank some of her drink. That was at 8, it got worse.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I was scoping hash out of our weed jar with a spoon and I realized we need to buy actual utensils. This plastic shit is killing me I've broke 3 spoons
if youre pregnant and ruin my spring break i'll never forgive you.
im trying to find a facebook picture of him that doesnt make me regret sleeping with him. its not working
It's like you are the superhero of getting jizzed on
I just made my roommate a 'Hope you don't have chlamydia' cake.
Make one for john too.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I feel like it'll be a success as long as she doesn't end up dead in a ditch. There has to be a line somewhere.
I have a terrible feeling that I made out with a fraternity last night
This bar smells like your ball sack. In a weird way I miss you.
It makes me feel all patriotic & free... And borderline diabetic.
Drink water, eat food, and stop tazing yourself
Your parents are gone and we haven't fucked in their bed... why?
Randomize