do you think the kids from 7th heaven are mad that dennis and sweet dee are their half-brother and sister?
Do you ever go through someone elses pictures and just appreciate the fact that youre not really friends with them?
I listened to the last 10 minutes of that 20 minute voicemail, it's solid gold. At one point he literally suggests we buy tasers and go around shooting people.
He doesn't fuck you and he's married, why do you keep letting him cum all over your stomach?
In the hopes he'll just put it in one day?
I guess I tried to spit on a homeless man on the walk home...Out. Of.Hand.
he described going down on me as being like 'entering a jungle of deliciousness and fur
thanks for carrying me to bed.. and sorry for trying to roll down the hallway to escape.
honestly I asked the same thing when we had our slip n slide and margarita party
Vom Wallet is no more. We now boldly enter a responsible, adult era where we will not throw up liquor onto ourselves.
I STILL HAVE A HARD TIME DECIDING WHAT TO WEAR IN THE MORNING HOW WOULD IT BE POSSIBLE FOR ME TO PICK A PAIR OF PANTS AND GO OH ILL JUST WEAR THESE FOR THE REST OF MY LIFE
You thanked your mom for the gymnastic lessons so you could do a keg stand
One day i'll wow you with artfully trimmed pubes.
I tried to open a bottle of wine with toenail clippers last night. So this morning was obviously rough.
ok morning sex is a totally valid reason to come in late... ur good, cya in 20
I'm gonna go take a shower so I can cleanly change into my drinking underwear.
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