Do you have a straightener and are extra lubricated condoms not the norm?
Just saw an old lady trip and stumble. Laughed. Kept Driving. I'm going to hell.
so are you any less fat since you started doing blow?
The cab driver had me sign for the payment and I was like give me a second while I throw up right outside your door.
I have bruises on the inside of my thighs from sliding down the stair case...thanks for encouraging that slut show
I can feel myself smiling like 10 minutes after I stop smiling, and that's just like... so awesome.
What I'm trying to say is, that time you chained me to my dresser and made me beg for it was incredibly romantic.
I GOT A VENDING MACHINE FOR OUR LIVING ROOM
Who was the person who brought the rooster when they won @ beer pong
He tried to puke in the 14th hole and when I told him to stop he started chanting "hole in one hole in one"
Can't decide if this guy is hot or if I'm just bored.
Sex is clearly the solution either way.
If there's anything my liberal arts education has taught me, it's belligerence.
Tbh I would eat a grilled cheese off your dick.
Quick question—how good are you at digging holes? I mean, besides the one you've dug for yourself. asking for a friend
I haven’t taken my socks off in over 36 hours. I should add that to my bumble profile.
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