This kristen chick is fuckin nuts. She's pyscho. She's a trainwreck. She carries baggage. She's... Perfect.
I was debating whether her purse was real then I saw her puke in it.
Fell asleep in bio again. Sometimes i feel like college is just one really expensive nap.
One of my students just told me turtles are lazy and need to get a job. Fuck yes, my job here is done.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
he just came in and straightened the chair and left again
Your tequila is gone. I suggest you bring more home before you go out for dinner. Money is taped to mailbox.
She's been drinking and was roller blading. I'm sure you can do the math
Remember that picture you sent me of you trying to eat the flower arrangement in the bathroom at that restaurant?
Remember the bouncer that knocked out Dave and Sam? Apparently his day job is a florist. Uppercut and fresh cut in one package.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
DONT TALK SHIT ABOUT LUNCHABLES
I need a costume
Dude just wear a bra or something hahaha
Jesus when did you leave my house? I found 2 bottles of wine, vodka, and a book with blow all over it wondering if I was read bedtime stories
If you come home to me in lingerie and you start vacuuming...I need to reevaluate my priorities
i cant go to his party cause last time i pressed the red buttons on the wall and the fire alarm went off for 40 minutes, i'm not allowed back there
Don't know where this pizza came from but i got breakfast in bed
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