i saved all my weight watcher points for this alcohol
I want to do you till i cant cum anymore. Till all i get is a little flag that says "bang".
We need to either start getting drunk more often or one of us need to start doin drugs
Wtf? Why?
I want awesome conversations to show the world.
Ok so my english teacher told me i could have 5 absences bc of my "problem". I have no idea what she is talking about
the only plus side is that now I'll be able to tell my son not to trust the condoms that his college gives away..........
They're giving me a hotel, and this chick doesn't have a place to stay for the night... I swear this is how real life Porno starts.
You came on your own forehead. Just wanted to remind you that.
I had to jump out of her car while it was moving enough said
Just saw a tranny in a skimpy captain america costume walking around campus. Going to follow her. You gotta see this
I'd rather take 10 virginities than catch something. Right now I should be good, I mean the sex with Jake was so bad he can't possibly have an std
Last thing I remember was a hand in the pants. Then I woke up next to a full beer and a McDouble, which I promptly had for breakfast.
Well I mean enduring a 45 minute conversation about C-sections was worth the 9 jello shots those soccer moms gave me.
We have had more Sex in the past 48 hours then we have in the past 3 months. I think it was from me dressing up as Darth Vader.
I ate too many pot brownies and passed out topless with my boobs painted like the American flag
hotelroom bed is big enough to masturbate in, but small enough to not want to sleep in it after you've masturbated in it
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