it was a mass text i'm sorry
do you usually send 'hey sexy' as a mass text?
happy early fathers day!!!
im not a father
about that...
Let me rephrase. Would it display my intentions too much if i walked all the way across my office and into the bathroom carrying my book
When he took off his pants i accidently shouted "that is one small wiener," and thats when he left
you'd think someone with a dick that small would take what he could get
Who topped off the "random beer mix" beer bong with a pinch of pepper?? All you could taste was busch and pepper...
Oh my God, that is a gorgeous man. And I wasn't even gay until five minutes ago.
I'm sorry I peed on your everything.
I'm confused as to why I have a picture of your boobs in response to a photo of my father
This is classic penis vs brain.
You wanted to go find him and we told you to sit down cause you kept stumbling. You yelled " I CAN STAND!! It's the walking part I can't figure out!"
How do I cancel buying spotify premium for two homeless people?
I'm constantly crying, and now I start crying every time I masturbate which is a fun development.
whatcha doing?
lying in bed pretending to be a slug
I really love you. Like, more than tequila...& we both know that's my favorite.
I'm still thinking about that amazing orgasm last night. I literally heard angels singing "Hallelujah!!"
Randomize
