My booty call said shes done doing the walk of shame. Wtf is that?
It's what anyone that sleeps with you, specifically, does when they leave. Some do it even when they just think of you.
Yeah. He most definitely jizzed himself in the face.
I am going to be the most sexually active ladybug that he has ever seen
he asked me if i wanted "a hit" off his inhaler. its definitely time for a new roommate
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
So many stories. To uyou are sober. I heart you though. Jesus. Dirrty dancing jusyt came oine!!no. Lie.
Why don't we skip the roadtrip entirely, save us the trip, and go straight to jail?
He explained how that handle got into our fridge. I think i'm going to stick with my original assumption that the vodka gods want me to drink more vodka.
Very impressive. My GPA is the same amount of orgasms I can offer tonight (valid only tonight): 3.5
I just duct taped myself into my costume. I apologize in advance if you find me in a compromised position involving duct tape and underwear when you get home tonight
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So if I get kidnapped from my office and go missing for a few days does that count against my vacation days and do I still get paid?
WHAT KIND OF GUY JACKS OFF TO A PICTURE OF A BUTT WHAT IS THIS THE 1980s
There is a high possibility I will pass out with my hand in a bag of Doritos
At least your vagina gets to vagina again. Dust that thing off.
If I die tonight, you and your brother can split my money evenly for college only.
all $38?
You're a wizard. You are a master of disguise. You are beautiful. I love you.
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