he promised me brunch in the morning so i felt like it was ok....i really need to get a job.
you jizzed all over me and yelled "makeover"
The night ended with a lot of tears and everyone singing along to Willenium
Don't take this the wrong way but I just mistook a trash can for you
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
just wrote a 6 page paper on my blackberry. including 3 sources. college is teaching me good things so far.
Everyone knows relationships are a winter sport
Can we skip lunch and do power hour sex time from now on? I'll let you eat nachos off my body if you really need the food.
there isn't one for "I'll give you an I'm sorry blowjob" but that's also an option you have. in the meantime here is an emoticon of a caterpillar
Just puke n rally. People can't judge, it's syllabus week.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Today is a spill-drugs-all-over-myself kind of day.
FINE YOU CAN EAT HOT WINGS WHILE WE HAVE SEX
He stopped me in the middle of a blow job to call his grandma for her birthday.
At least he has family values.
this isn't the first time i woke up with peanut butter in my butt
You showed up at my house at 4am with a bloody nose, one shoe and a bucket of chicken... I live no where near a place that sells chicken in a bucket..
Well that would explain the bones in my purse.
I was like ahh were on two different pages, I know there's rumors of me moving to boston but I can't and I'm not adding long distance to the relationship I have with my 31 year old recently divorced ex boss
Randomize