It's pouring out. I am cold, wet, and miserable.... Kind of reminds me of our sleepover last night.
his penis was crooked so i rode him at an angle. he seemed used to this.
Will you be topless? That will affect my answer.
This is going to be a 3 day beach sex fest. Do you understand
Why do you have to go to the hospital?
I gotta apologize to a male nurse who's tryin to press assault charges on me
The intern claims someone glued plastic eyeballs to his penis last night. He going to show everyone in the conference room at 3pm. There is a $5 cover charge.
Sounds like sex on a twister board.
An idea that is both hilarious and intriguing...
I'm throwing in the towel on today. The puke gods have won this war
I just did a jell-o shot with my grandmother. I can die now..
No offense, I mean I'm sure you rocked my world and all but I don't remember.
She's started this new thing where whenever she drives by random couples talking alone outside she yells "break up! this is your sign!"
I'm so drunk. Liken realign drink
Like really drunk?
Or did you enjoy repositioning your drink?
I just really don't even know what I would do with a boyfriend... Like do I just kiss it and then leave it in the corner? Like how often does it eat??
I'm not saying you're stupid, just that you have bad luck when thinking...
He’s only in town today and our afternoon sex sesh kept getting interrupted by the neighbor’s kid yelling and screaming in the pool
Randomize
