Turns out you're obligated under man law to share any passwords you may have for porno sites
Is that what they're teaching u at that bar review class?
he found my favorite bra, 3 thongs and a pair of jeans and gave them back. i love move out day.
i will be the first lesbian to ever fail women's studies.
Shes been standing with her arms crossed in front of the mirror for 45 minutes...she told me she's "getting sober"
My printer just jammed because one of the condom wrappers I threw when we had sex in my dorm
Passed out in a rocking chair on her porch. Woke up to the tow truck taking away my car.
My bullwhip has saved my life tonight and gotten me laid. I'm gonna be Indiana Jones every Halloween!
I call BS on that! THAT WAS TOTALLY AN INTERCEPTION. JENNINGS HAD THAT.
PEOPLE ARE FLIPPING FURNITURE HERE. IN THE ROOM ABOVE ME. I HEARD SOMEONE WOOKIE CALL IN ANGER FROM SOMEWHERE IN THIS BUILDING.
I'd be lying if I said I wasn't scared, even a little.
woke up in your bed at 6 AM. on my way home I passed Nathan, bloody, barefoot, and still in a toga. He told me he woke up in a ditch then kept repeating "I'm totally bringing this up at meeting tomorrow". I'm proud of your frat today
So we just smoked a bowl, out of an antler, with this old dude, while standing at the bar. Dude just walked up and said we were in his spot, just began packing it and handing it around...
Well I took a spicy wing shit in a field this morning.
I'm standing up, for my all my brothers and sisters, and fighting against whiskey dick.
Why did I ever allow that penis to enter my sacred temple?
He said he couldn't fuck me cause I kinda looked like my brother
So I'm buying milk, bread, yogurt & lube. Not awkward at all
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