Just bought purple Ray Bans. If there was any small chance that I would ever have sex with women ever again, I just buried it.
There is a girl in bio drinking beer out of a starbucks cup with a straw
I might not be able to enter cuba but that doesn't mean that a cuban can't enter me
I wish there was a classy way to show off your boobs.
I remember tearing his shower curtain down but I don't remember trying to shave my vag...
just cheers'ed a flock of cattle as i drove past eating a burger i bought 7 hours ago. that high.
it was really awkward meeting your mom for the first time while i was still wearing the condom we were using.
ALL CAPS CUZ ITS SERIOUS SHAME.
By the time the opening band finished, she was already slurring, coming on to the gay couple next to us, and waving her panties in the air.
Dude there is a stripper at my door saying she has my birthday present. She knows my name...but it's not my birthday...
God works in mysterious ways my friend.
If you got tons of KY ads on HuluPlus, it's because I hit "relevant" every time.
I don't want to resort to having sex with people that actually like me.
I'm determined to sit on that face.
So you broke your ribs while fucking? Dude you just got about 25% hotter.
IN OTHER NEWS did you guys see Orlando Bloom's penis today? I did
Randomize
