Thong +tight pants =hungry butt. Not a good look on big women! Walmart sucks.
its 9am. i just got home. spent 6 hours blowing him in a closet last night
my facebook is like a giant collection of my one night stands
Peach margaritas. And fuck whatever you're about to say, the girl to guy ratio is like 6:1. I need those odds
josh has a chalupa in his pocket if you're hungry.
You need to stop blackout tweeting at him to have sex with you on the roof of your dorm. He doesn't even have a twitter.
If a man doesnt have the ability to fuck you well on a small climbing wall, I don't think he deserves you.
you know you have a brother who cares when he hands you a piece of pizza before you pass out from too many bong hits
I sent him a naked picture of me with the caption "I lost at beer pong, this was a dare. Hope your nights going as good as mine" I've never talked to him in my life, this is a strange way to start.
Currently at a fetish club with a set of swings (don't ask). Having flashbacks to the park by my house
Opened the browser on my phone to a web search for midget birth rates per capita. A good night.
I appreciate that you take the time to fix your typos even while masturbating
do you remember yelling out "insecurity makes my pussy dry!" unnecessarily loud at the bar?
You're at a grade school volley ball game with a yeti of tequila. You've passed extra
You know you started drinking too early in the day when you have a hangover at midnight
thats called having FUN
Randomize
