Well we ran into the cornfields when the cops got there. We'd been hiding in there for 45 mins when he asks me "So this wasn't exactly how I'd planned this but I thought I'd ask. How do you feel about oral sex?"
Lots of explosions. Minor nudity. Full penetration and lots of tuxedos.
This girl in the gym has an amazing body...too bad there's no workout routine for a face.
No that's sign language, not a drinking game. I tried to join
Mystery solved: The table is broken because I had sex on it last night.
they're doing drop shots of Jager into red wine. i don't want to be on that level
Blonde girl lying face-down, passed out next to my bed, walls are covered in guacamole. College is looking excellent.
I am coping with the snow storm with beer and shots of jack. If I were outside in shorts I might be able to pass as a Canadian.
If it goes near your penis, it should not go near the Hawks.
Well, she yelled at the stripper that she couldn't lick whipped cream off his nipples because she is lactose intolerant.
That isn't the worst part. It got a bazillion times more awkward when he read me a poem he wrote about his dead cat.
I know how to kill a man with nutmeg and a sword. You in?
Or nah
Sometimes I just take my boobs out of my shirt so they can get some fresh air
I'm too depressed to drink my wine. That is what I would call a serious problem
Just got an x-ray done of my hip and you can clearly see the outline of my penis in it. When the doctor saw it she said "wow I haven't seen one that big on an x-ray before." Pretty sure the doc and the nurses are going to be talking about me on their lunch break.
Randomize
