She seriously needs to find another hobby other than bouncing on cock.
im covered in puffy paint and glitter i cant find kevin and im wearing shoes that dont belong to me....come get me please
Wow, So this kid just walked into class, yak'd on his lab partner then runs out. Class is now cancelled. I gotta find this kid and Thank him.
he said he has something really important to tell me but isn't ready yet. It's either that he loves me or has herpes
She brought a box of chocolates to give the bartender and now he's giving her free shots.. Why didn't we think of that?
If you fool around, take the WHITE sweatshirt off of her first. It's mine, and I don't like your cum nearly as much as she does.
I have to cancel. My sons dad is out of jail unexpectedly and i'm kinda an emotional wreck. P.s. This is not the life I dreamed of as a little girl.
Stop treating my vagina like a slapchop.
I don't know man, I have to ask my girlfriend if I can borrow my balls from her purse.
How's my sex life is me mastubating next to her dog. that's how it's going.
Why did I wake up in bed with the ironing board and a Mariah Carey mask? Vodka hates me
He caught me mid-escape...one leg out the window, bra n thong in hand.I just looked at him and said "Bye Now" n proceeded to fall out his window....then.... tell me why he texted me 30 min later to make sure i got home ok! #igotthis
You wouldn't put pants on to see my parents.
It smells like grilled cheese and sexual frustration
Well, if I'm gonna go gay, it's gonna be for NPH
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