Is it weird if i grunt like Tim Taylor when im having sex AND grilling steaks??
Threesome last night. Not that cool, you tend to pick a favorite.
I wanna get FUCKED up and fail the piss test at my eval so they send me to detox and give me suboxone... Is that bad?
It's alright she couldn't hear you. Her legs were over her ears
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm pregaming for my hair cut. Working two jobs definately taught me how to use my time wisely...
You came on the chandelier from the first floor.. Of course were allowed back
Some guy just drank alcohol from me shoe..I think he's had enough..
Next time someone asks you what your spirit animal is do you really want to answer the iowa state fair butter cow?
I want a bottle of whiskey to be dropped at my doorstep like a stork drops babies when they are delivered to their parents.
God what have you done to be that much in need of alcohol.
Me WANTS my preciousssssssssss
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I was drunk while I accepted my job offer. Here's to growing up.
What the World Series means to me is that I've slept with too many giants fans.
Well he has a golden retriever set as his background so there's no way he was filming us having sex
I can't believe I watched you put a tampon in in the parking garage
I'm hungover from the 8pm vodka and still drunk from the 5am beer.
A dozen naked frat boys in squirrel masks just ran by. Welcome to the official start of the holidays.
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