69 |D_O
wtf does that mean??
it's a very specialized emoticon, means 'i heard you fucking some dude through my bedroom wall last night and so i listened intently"
just saw an old couple make out...not too sure how I feel about it. though I will admit at one point I was thinking "oh yeah! get that!"
Have u ever been so drunk that pissing urself felt like a better idea than walking to the bathroom? I entered those waters last night
Instead of a promise ring i got my clit peirced, its a promise that ill always give you ass! =]
My bosses just told me they met their wives on one night stands. I'm stoked.
i think i'd rather have a trophy of a like jizz stained curtain or something
He fell asleep in the strip club and they paid some stripper $20 to sit on his face until he woke up.
He got me coffee AND filled up my gas tank. He must've fucked another girl in my car..
And all I ask is the occasional "welcome home from work" blowjob.....and for you to fold my laundry. I hate folding laundry
this night just went from meh to biblical thanks to drunk naked yahtzee
I don't think it's food poisoning, I think it's cause you cooked it over burning styrofoam
Was having relations of the behind variety with my girlfriend. Based on where we were at I could see myself in the bathroom mirror. You know I did the Patrick Bateman point and wink at the mirror and turned on sissudio by Phil Collins.
You were yelling at the mannequin and saying "DON'T LOOK AT ME"
Omg, new summer goal: sex in a bouncy castle.
The smell of pee and coconut conditioner still makes me think of him
Randomize