Oh man dude like 1000 to 1500 milligrams. Its gonna burn like bad though.
her fupa was seducing me. this is the last time i'm doing shrooms.
If i could bang her from 80ft away, I would
Dude. Muppets take manhattan on netflix instant. Pass my midterm or relive my childhood? Tough decision.
beeferoni + vodka = puke stuck in braces.
I got spanked with a cardboard tube. Apparently he used to be a percussionist. Who favored marching band tunes. It was weird.
He said to me this morning that we should finish these beers, go and get plan B then on the way back, go to the pub to celebrate the death of our baby. I love Manchester.
we are sitting in a kindergarden classroom alone chugging beer. look at our lives. look at our choices.
So he was supposed to be helping me with my math but instead we ended up drinking coconut rum in his basement and having sex. I think my mom was right, getting a tutor will be good for me. Relieves the stress.
There's a middle eastern man wearing a cow costume with tequila coming out of his udders, but I'm not sober enough to feel uncomfortable with it.
oh dear god, that would be like watching to female walruses mate. We need to stop going to that lesbian bar...
I don't know what weirder, the fact that I flat out said "I thought I deleted you from facebook" or that she responded with "I just hacked your account and readded myself". Never thought I'd say this but I wish drunk me would stop making friends!
Just checked in with my friend who walked in on us. He thinks you two had a spiritual connection and he's bugging out
He was also rolling face on molly so his perception of divinity might be slightly off
I maxed out my credit card last night on powdered donuts and beef jerky
Why does 10AM Spanish always turn into a discussion about my sex life?
Randomize
