i just saw a foot job.
porn is incredible...
We had like 4 guys come over and buy us all drinks as an excuse to hit on Kendra. Hanging out with her is now officially fiscally responsible.
Why do you proceed to call me "Queen La Queefah?"
you were carrying a trash bag around insisting it was your purse. I'll let you guess how your night went
Gay TA. Finally going to boost my GPA your way.
When the cops came you just told them you'd go to your time out corner.
i have a picture in my phone of you with a bottle of tequila in your back pocket. i believe you were saying "pocket of champions" or something along those lines
i need to start using my dry humping skills. i was dry humping champion in 7th grade
But the real question is how many people didn't see my dick last night?
It's been over a year since we've been get-so-drunk-you-throw-beer-cans-at-fat-girls-drunk together. That needs to change.
I wanna say I regret bonging a beer while having sex with Mike, but it helped me get thru it.
my roommate woke me up with head. more awkward than it sounds.
So you broke your ribs while fucking? Dude you just got about 25% hotter.
Yeah that stuff was rough. We insisted on wearing our bikinis all down college ave, and at several parties that were not beach themed
You tried to chase every shot with a blueberry.
Randomize
