Dude wtf I'm sitting behind some girl in class who is creeping on my facebook page. I don't even know who she is..
She just did a myspace photoshoot with her baby
just saw a girl come out of the tanning bed room on crutches, now thats determination
i slept with her, drove her to her sisters house to babysit, and then drove around the block where i met her sister and had sex with her in my van. I'm family Friendly!
ps if your frozen peas taste like crotch it's because some dude kicked me in the nuts while trying to do a keg stand and I needed an ice pack
Medically speaking as your gynecologist and your girlfriend, that is not a rash.
And we're breaking up
I just text my one night stand Happy Easter on her way home...now would be a good time for the lord to smite me.
The Australian strangers convinced me to leave him behind when they started chanting Aussie Aussie Aussie, Oy Oy Oy, and told me they had a bunch of beer at their place.
I climaxed at the same time the bass dropped. I think it's safe to say I've reached enlightenment
he told me he didn't like my name so he was going to call me Casey instead
Apparently the cops had to handcuff me in order to get me to come with to the hospital with them. They asked me if I had had any experience with handcuffs before and I replied, "Only in bed." What a life
Finally finished unpacking shit from school n found a bra with no idea whose it is... I miss college so much it hurts sometimes
Do I masturbate or eat a pound of matazah. Alissa help what do I do??
He makes me want to cheat on my other 3 boyfriends..
yeah, last night we handcuffed you and you started crying saying that you weren't a bad person
Randomize
