moral of the story: I'm going to stab everyone
stalking is really helping my grade.. I followed him to a review session tonight
i'm so sad bro, I can't get any pussy. I'm so sad
He told me to fuck off at some point in the night. I think it was right before he jumped out of a moving car trying to get to another bar and made Abby cry.
If she says "This is how acid feels" one more time I'm never trip-sitting them again.
it says 'tasty bitch' in sharpie on my tits...
Don't pretend you don't want to dance on the edge of overdose all three nights
Just woke up from a dream where I had lesbian sex with myself (a clone of me)... Take that, Freud!
I showed him my toy collection and he goes, "You won't need those anymore," and dropped his pants. I threw the House of Pleasure out last night.
Why the fuck is there a picture of us jumping a girl that's wearing my chicken mask?
If you can't accept me drawing a Santa hat on your penis then we can't be friends
I don't WANT a sex disease! Especially one assigned to me by my supervisor..
Shut up. You had me at killer robots. Your place or mine?
Was last night real life? Like did you really light your hair on fire
A piece of your chipped nail polish just fell out of my crotch.
Randomize
