she pooed on me. she actually pooed on me.
It just feels so wrong throwing away the condoms into her Hello Kitty trashcan
I'm scared at the amount of beastiality in this conversation.
She's never going to forget it... Christmas Anal.
"The juvenile turned and faced the officer, unzipped his pants, placed a fresh cigarette in between his legs and preceded to light it with a match"
There's a fried egg and an empty bottle of reddiwhip in the parking lot. Did you have fun last night?
This coming from the girl who broke up with a guy because she found out he played the tuba in middle school.
Dude between pissing everywhere and all of those frogs, that bathroom got wrecked.
Sarah is throwing up still and I'm eating salad with my fingers
I need vodka mixed w a bit of holy water right now
I completely forgot I gave up beer. But airports don't count. They're like international waters. No rules.
wanna see your best friend chug a bottle of steak sauce?
please go to sleep
When the theology professor asked me what touched me most about this trip to Rome, I guess "the guy from last night" wasn't the proper response.
You're up at 3AM, right? I have a very important question.
You know the Wendy's on route 6, by Kohls? Do you know if it has a drive through?
Yes it does.
Do you remember what happened last night? All I could find we're phone numbers of strip clubs in Detroit. Did we go to Detroit?
Randomize
