we just ha sex. he lasted two minutes. i told him to leave because i had class
isnt today saturday?
just took my ibuprofen with ramen broth, yay college
just printed 333 ways to get kicked out of wal-mart. hello thursday night.
according to the woman who took my blood today, i have "party veins"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I think mounting someone proves who's house this is
Dude she pregamed for her sorority's philanthropy.
Lesson learned. Kayak oars are not golf clubs....check
holy shit i just had sex in a phone booth i so feel young again
I think the old lady next to me at the bar just saw your pussy
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Also bring a pizza or no entry to my vagina OR the fort.
Cheese only
He fell asleep cradling my ass and every time I moved he adjusted his hand accordingly. I've found the one.
The best part about theater chicks is nothing is too cliche or out of line. I just fucked her Braveheart style in my entry way while saying goodbye.
I woke up on the hammock spooning a box of Cheese Itz.
I got drunk. Then I took a shit.
It was a good shit
She put her coat on went to leave and called me an asshole. I responded with "I never said I wasn't" and then she pounced on me like a cat on cat nip.
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