I think youre just another guy trying to take advantage of a young naive innocent girl
you're not innocent... Once you have taken it in the turd cutter you can't label yourself innocent.
he said it was like fucking a big sack of slut potatoes
If I come over right now will you promise to distract your grandpa in the morning so I don't have to do the walk if shame with 1940's style judgement?
So, i took all the condoms from his nightstand, not in the crazy ex way, but in the I paid for them way.
You can't see him, he's in front of the dildo, but Amelia Earhart is blocking your view.
Maybe her vagina is like a vacuum
I can't decide if that would be a good or bad thing. I'm leaning toward good
I'm using toast as a chaser. If I wasn't already so fucked up this would be revolting.
i accidenteley seduced the christian girl's brother so i dont think we can count on free church picnic food again
She found my old SD card with stuff I "didn't keep" or "didn't record us doing".... She's pissed but really horny. Did I just win at sex?
YOU BROUGHT HANDCUFFS TO THE WHITE ELEPHANT EXCHANGE AND DIDN'T TELL ME???
COKE WAS NOT ON THE ITINERARY FOR TONIGHT.
Do you own a cuff key and know where Karen lives?
THAT'S NOT NICE
NEITHER WAS PROMISING NOT TO TAKE MY SISTER'S VIRGINITY, THEN PROMPTLY DOING SO
So I sniffed too hard this morning before work and I THINK THE COCAINE JUST STARTED ROUND 2.
Ahhh, beer. My second favorite breakfast drink.
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