this girl just gave me her phone number and 5 mins later right in front of me she is giving her number to another dude
call her and ask her what she thinks she's doing
why doesnt he love me? i have tried everything. i even sang to him after sex.
you have got to be kidding?
Want updates from david's night out drinking? If so text back DAVID to this number. Std rates apply.
the paramedic just looked at me like "you again?"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Am I the only one creeped out by the guy asleep behind our couch?
We're in ER. He's high on morphine and I'm drunk. Gonna score some bed pans for jello shots.
I feel like jumping into a breast pit right now. Like the old school ball pits at mcdonalds.
I just asked her to come in through the window, this pretty much solidifies the whole fuck-buddy thing...
I was about to take him home and fuck his brains out but then the police came and arrested him for the stolen credit card he had been buying me drinks with all night...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Dude fuck drugs. It's 4am and I'm eating mushroom ravioli fantasizing about jumping on a trampoline
Well at least ssomeone is or the state is tafing over ir in twligiob
It's pretty self explanatory. You tried to have sex on the hood of a car in front of everyone
That girl is like a master class on how to be an unlovable crazy person.
He casually compared computer science to childbirth and I was like "hey, as someone who has wanted to fuck you for six months now, could you please never talk about childbirth ever again"
be the chaos you wish to see in the world...
i'm trying to figure out how to respond to that in text
Randomize