Brutal- a couple weeks back I had a 28 hr blackout and four day hangover. S'why I decided to haul it in
i normally make it a rule to leave when white people start rapping... but they had blow.
Why do i even want him? It's like his dick is a trophy and I need to put it on my wall of shame.
I found the hair cut I want on the girl in the porno I'm watching. now really sure how to show my stylist.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
For when you/if you wake up tomorrow.. You broke 4 of the bar's glasses tonight and I am currently watching you as you ride the broom around the bar instead of cleaning up your mess. I am no longer able to come up with excuses for you.
He said I was the "egg mcmuffin" of blowjobs. I'm flattered.
Do you think he feels stupid trying to bang girls with his small penis? I'd be embarrassed.
He showed up at my door at 3 AM wearing a Santa hat with a tiara attached.
When they send me to rehab, I'm screaming your name down the halls.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I threw up this morning to Silent Night playing in background. It was actually quite soothing.
Okay, yeah, judgmental guy at 7/11. I'm buying g wine at 10:20 in the morning. You wanna fight about it?
I ate all your munchie Mac and Cheese cause you left me on the lawn. If you don't want it to happen gain, drag my drunk ass inside next time
if anyone breaks out the olive oil & slip n slide, text me 911.
As your boyfriend, I'm gonna congratulate you on winning that fist fight. But as a cop, I have to tell you to not do that again.
I didn't mean that as an expression. I'm literally asking if you want to watch Netflix and do nothing.
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