you kept running across the street. everytime you made it across successfully you took something off. can't believe there were no cops around...
oh thats it?
I learned much from the teen babysitter: I can light a cigarette in a microwave.
That Joe Wilson reference just earned you a blow job, Mister!
I just had teddy grams, ritz crackers, and twizzlers for dinner. Hello, end of the semester.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
What a whore. She reminds me of that asian guy who can eat all the hotdogs.
I don't know if it's lucky or if it really just makes my tits look THAT good, but I've never NOT gotten laid with this bra on
The guy who just got ate on True Blood had the same balls as you.
We are buying drugs from a guy with a Jesus fish on his dodge caravan.
Checked my photo vault today... My self nudie folder is passing the 150 mark.
The weird thing is that you don't send them to anyone. You just keep them for yourself...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
What would you say is the recommended tip for a hotel maid who has to clean up vomit on just about every surface of a hotel bathroom?
You know you're too high when you find yourself crying at " hand in my pocket" by Alanis Morissette because it's "just TOO REAL"
This little girl and her dad are walking behind me. "Why is he wearing pajamas?" Mind your own business, kid.
You offered the police officer a Snickers ice cream bar and cried when he wouldn't take it...
He a gives rim jobs, because, of course a guy who opens doors and makes reservations would lick your anus..like a gentleman.
Its official, kitchen-couch is my favorite.
You passed out again didn't you?
its likely that this occurred.
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