dude, my own friends sent me home from a party last night. real cool assholes. real cool
the couple across the street's about to bang. go get the popcorn and come join us.
What wine goes with Cap'n Crunch?
there was a guy who was being paid to stand outside of Abercrombie without a shirt on... normally i would be okay with this but he was 40...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Since when does sleeping with your RA not result in free meal swipes? I feel so tricked...
Only in this snowstorm did have I realized the lengths I'll go to to get laid.
shes wearing an ankle tracker so she should be easy to find
its 2pm. u awake yet?
ill text u back later. still peeling fingernail polish off my face.
She has dubbed herself the Pied Piper of Penis and keeps yelling about getting Cocktober started... Will send pix soon
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I don't know how it happened. All I did was tell her I was impressed by her presentation. Her nail marks on my back ain't going away anytime soon.
How weird would it be for me to get 1 hour photos printed at CVS of my partially or all nude?
Three Decembers later, I'm looking at this fuckin Santa lingerie I bought and just realized my stocking never got stuffed....
I was totally going to fuck him and then his friend walked in brushing his teeth, whipped down his pants and started doing the windmill. Ultimate cock block
My hands smell like penis... I can't even remember the last time i touched a penis, but my hands say i did. Oh the mystery.
If you wanna fuck the pudding, fuck the pudding. Just not the chocolate, Im gonna eat that.
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