I'm pretty sure there is a country song about this exact situation
I mistook a propane tank for a keg.
i walked into his room and he was eskimo kissing his weed..
Just saw 30+ dicks. Explain later.
It's my fault there's ramen coiled around his penis.
i wish i had the videos of us pissing on him last night.
no. 1 rule of bromania: no females
Like some sort of pot growing robin hood.
If I give you a key to my place you have to promise to one day wake me up with a blowjob.
And by one day I mean once every two weeks.
I forgot to pack a bra for work today...you would not believe the extremes i've had to go through in order to keep these nips from my coworkers
Turns out he has a 6pack too. Alright adorable snapchatting manwhore dude, you win.
Just because your drunk doesn't mean you can stick your dick in the snow. Just a FYI
She told us she had powers and that eating tree bark cures the shits.
i think if a sober person was watching us they would have not thought we were witty
Yup we found her. The bouncer was carrying her out
Randomize
