can u get pink eye on your cock?
He kept saying the best defense against a lion is to punch it in the throat.
You tried to tell me you weren't high while you were eating French onion dip out of the jar with a spoon
She was holding a turtle doing a beer bong out of a flower watering can.
Judging by his buldge, this guy is huge. just paid steve to follow him into the bathroom and find out. They had a convo about it.
i think i made a good impression on his friends wen i survived 55 cup beer pong
Who topped off the "random beer mix" beer bong with a pinch of pepper?? All you could taste was busch and pepper...
This is like the time you took a picture of your knees and told him it was your tits, isn't it?
Yeah. Rock bottom was him passing out and saying "are you putting a condom on me?" and me covering his mouth and saying shhhhh
He ordered three small pizzas while I was giving him head.
Maybe one day we'll get unicorn butt tattoos together
im buying my prof a giftcard to the state store bc he talked ab crying into a glass of tequila so he deserves it
Is it appropriate to be taking shots at 11 on sunday?
Absolutely same thing as church only different
At least he uses his lack of impulse control for chaotic good instead of chaotic evil
the voting booth dude cock blocked me or she woulda totally blown me in the voting booth.
Randomize
