you were sitting on my toliet with a double cheesburger in your hand asking me how the cheeseburger even got there.
But i guess when you use blowjob as a verb you are entitled to some language allowances
The fact that he grabbed my boob in the middle of the conversation shows something needs to change
Remember that foreign guy who never talked last night? He just came out of my bathroom when I woke up.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She said I was the most selfish person in bed she's ever been with and she's fucked Tucker Max.
Woke up w/ the same freshman as last Saturday but we were sober this time. Is that a relationship?
So fucking hammered. Is this all spelled right? I'm holding it up to my eye. I am on a boulder. I feel like an owl
the most romantic thing he could do for me right now would be to throw himself into traffic
He's German, so by default he gets to fuck me.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It's a whole movie about Joseph Gordon-Levitt watching porn and having sex... I NEED to own it..
I've seriously never been more thankful for marijuana and my resting bitchface.
I only spent $42 at the bar last night, it's some sort of miracle.
you do remember it was dollar beer night, right?
That answers my next five questions
A lady played my boobs as if they were drums. It's been that kinda night.
There is way too much butt cleavage here for a formal event.
Is it acceptable to respond to a declaration of love with 'and I love your dick'? Asking for a friend who shares a name and possibly a phone number with me. Entirely coincidental.
Randomize