apparently i started the naked brigade. and depantsed everyone who wasn't naked. her parents must hate me.
everyone knows that carl winslow was the sexiest man in die hard.
You and I should start a club for people who woke up on outside on a bench with no idea how they got there.
jersey shore drinking game rules must be edited. almost died. how is it possible for a person to say guido that many times
Was just grinding with my bio TA. She asked why i wasnt studying
I don't hate you. My dick is upset with you, but I don't hate you.
i woke up to him dangling his cock in front of my face
... I went down on him at the movies. I feel like Alanis Morisette.
Say what you will, but only I can throw up on someone's door and make it look like art.
That's the last time I'm letting you drink that apple vodka
Our DD has become famous. Strippers are asking to be handcuffed to him.
I think were only still together so we can make each other miserable
I was just tongue fucked into oblivion.
i am craving dick and cupcakes
At one point of the night i was standing at the bar and 3 of them had their hands down my pants, they were like thumb wrestling for it.
I hate closet cases. I've been wooing this chick the entire quarantine. We finally meet up tonight, we're two drinks in, I've got my hand half way up her skirt and her husband calls. She promised to bring home dinner.
Randomize
