Fyi I let myself into your place, I'm wearing some of your clothes in your bed. Come take them off
chipotle is closed for thanksgiving... I am officially thankful for NOTHING.
No it was after you showed us his fraternaty letters shaven out of your pubes
Be still, my beating vagina.
Just heard the words 'Pussy Riot' on NPR...I almost crashed my car.
Just living on dreams and a bed of used condoms
the whole bar just wished me luck with my booty call tonight
You're worse than that girl who made out with her cousin at that party
That was you...
I don't think that calm, have their shit together people actually exist.
I almost forgot to feel shameful, if that answers your question.
Did I try to sell your body for chicken tenders last night?
I would go disguised as someone he didn't have premature ejaculative sex with but I don't know if I could stay in character.
I'm sittin in my Hawaiian shorts watching the office eating cold asparagus. wow do I suck when you're not here.
So she was amazing, that's what. Idk if it was the blow or the blowjob, but both my heads are still tingling.
If there's someone that knows accidental pantlessness, it's Mike.
Randomize
