Now hope fervently that she'll do it quick and cheap, just the way i like it
Plus she can make a mean sandwich! That's all I really need. Well that and foot jobs...
It'd be like medium rare by now.
I love how we're talking about your vagina like it's a piece of meat.
No, i know about the eggs and penis, the oh wow was for the fire
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i took it, then realized you live 3 ours away. but if you start driving now, im almost positive I'll still be hard
She was shaking her boobs and I was so high all I could think was "breast maracas"
You've been drinking wine and eating bacon all afternoon. HOW IS THAT DOING GOOD?!?!
I'm pretty sure we scarred one of our coworkers. This is the second time he has caught us both fully undressed and banging at work.
Either he has bad timing or he wants to join.
i gave up on the vacation being fun the night i ate all the marshamallows out of the lucky charms while everyone else was having sex in the condo
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
my confident boosted when he told me that it was I who started making out with him. ME. NOT HIM.
I AM SHOCKED AND PROUD OF MYSELF
Only you would consider your best friend fucking your boyfriend to be a sign of everlasting friendship
Driving, getting head and talking to your boss on the phone is not a good combination. I nearly died
So I figured out why that guy from Tinder stopped messaging me back. He got married.
I shouldn't be allowed to be in america for NYE... or any major holiday for that matter
Just woke up beside some twink in a kilt.. how is your sunday going
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