The guy I fucked in the port a poty just called me and asked me on a date!
Awkward!
No he was cute and I said yes!
Apparently mid blow job I started crying telling her how "Wonderful this blow job is"
SARAH B AND I ARE GOING TO GO HALFSIES AND BUY YOU A CAT. IS THAT OKAY. TO KEEP YOU COMPANY DURING THUNDERSTORMS SUCH AS THIS ONE. ITS BECAUSE WE LOVE YOU.
His penis has been a bonding mechanism beyond comparison.
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He's moaning and crying and coughing up something audibly liquid. I can't live in this house any more.
her mom went out of her way to book us a room with separate beds... her level of gay denial is in beast mode
I feel like passing out with my foot on your face has bonded us at a very fundamental level.
So Bodhi just sent me a pic of someone's balls with a message that says "I hope you all have a ballin' night." I don't even know what level of friendship to call this anymore.
Oh my god.
The ballsiest level.
I may have unintentionally punched your cat twice but he's an asshole anyway.
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He just used the word frick. Is that a possible red flag?
He has a beach house and a Simba tattoo. Our wedding is next Tuesday, hope you're free.
Since moving to the suburbs, all I do is fuck my ex and watch cartoons. It's not so bad.
I was taking a nap and she comes in wo/ pants, gets up on the bed and mounts my face while watching Weeds on Netflix. I'm okay with it, but at least let me wake up first.
also. when i get a car, the amount of space there is for sex WILL be a huge deciding factor.
It was just another case of she fell in love I fell asleep.
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