I had a dream last night that I was the one that killed Biggie
no, i will not be your spotter when you masturbate with a noose around your neck
bro im too drunk for your spanish code words. did you fuck her or not.
I've developed breathing exercises to keep myself from puking..
I wanna get "leaving my dick in charge" drunk.
Yah at one point i was listening to metallica and doing pushups last night. I went thru alot of emotions.
with a cock that big I don't even care that he makes a convincing drag queen
I'm going to fake an anxiety attack to get to the front of the line. Save me some brisket.
Wake up. Finish House of Cards. Put on pants.
Accurate.
You got me 4 pizzas and i just saw this. I'm too drunk for this shit. I just yelled "4 pizzas holy shit!" At the pizza dude
He didn't get how "starting a flash flood in my thunderhole" was a sexy euphemism. Deal breaker.
just curious, were the inflatable penis' received? Amazon says they were delivered.
That's not "anything", that's you deep throating a mozzarella stick.
Wanna see if we can get cut off at bdubs again? The same hipster manager that is younger than us is working again
like sometimes I wish I was allergic to latex so I wouldn't have sex with so many people..
Randomize
