Sry I called you an 8
i just pooped in tubberware. not a proud day
oh wait, my morality sensor is a little fucked up since I almost let my little sister's friend blow me.
Those balls look pretty dangerous.
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I think im definitely allergic to shell fish. Or hungover. Probably both.
i woke up and the dog was eating spaghetti off my chest.
This vodka tastes like I'm not going to class tomorrow.
Was there a Canadian at your party or did I dream that?
It would be like a dance party with a dick inside you. I think that's what Ke$ha wants for the world.
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We proceeded to buy tattoos from the dollar store and interpretive dance to of monsters and men, it's safe to say he's my new fuck buddy
50% drunk capacity currently
He's in grad school at Harvard. I suppose that means my vagina is now smarter than I am.
When I went to pick up Adam from the train station, I found him passed out, covered in gold paint and wrapped in a red blanket. someone had glued a gaudy green rhinestone to his forehead. He looked homeless.
I have filthy fantasies involving his tongue. My vagina almost exploded while he was licking that ice cream cone.
He loves blowjobs.. were meant for each other.
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