i am fully taking advantage of taking advantage of him
I fell asleep with crest white strips on and ate one...
i was like a deer caught in headlights with its coke-dick hanging out
through my window right now you can see the hot chick next door is standing BUTT ASS NAKED eating peanut butter off a knife.
ill be there in 5.
I have a date tonight... Like a real date... Not the kind where you just go over to his house and have sex and then never speak again.
I ate 12 cupcakes in less than 24 hours, so no judgement here.
What drink are we having for lunch?
My period started right as he was entering, which really helped me sell the "I've never done this before" bit.
Maybe if he'd step up his game and get a real job instead of donating plasma and trying to grow pot then you wouldn't feel compelled to write prisoners in Oregon.
I just stood beside an Amish man and bought Cocoa Krispies and tampons.
How drunk is too drunk to be on an airplane?
He shit with the door open. I think that means we are in a realtionship.
We really gotta wear capes to the bar more often...
Yeah come over whenever. Weed gets here at 8.
I'll be there at 7:59.
Try sleeping with him.
Why is it that all my gay friends have that solution...
Cuz you will have an answer or have sex.
Randomize