I have a deodorant stick dedicated to my balls.
just got my tax refund and at bell. how do you say i want a grand worth of 5 layer burritos in spanish?
And whoever invented the condom should be put to death.
There is a keg full of gin. THERE SHOULD NEVER EVER BE A KEG FULL OF GIN.
You were throwing ham at people telling them you were the sandwhich fairy
I made out with Jen. We were naked. I'm still gay. Forever
All I can see in the pic you sent is white shorts...
Thas my pasnts in colleg! Tehy glow! AND SMELL LIKE BEER!
2nd fun fact: he has a square tan line around his dick.
Stripper with the black hair and lip rings is still asleep. Found out she wasn't lying when she said she was a squirter, it was like splash mountain.
I can tell right now that knowing you will either be really fun or ruin my life
He has a beach house and a Simba tattoo. Our wedding is next Tuesday, hope you're free.
I didn't really understand how big 10 inches is. Now I know.
Dude there's ten thousand dollars worth of damage to the kids house and three thousand in stolen property and his dog is missing he is pissed
If I give him back his dog do you think he'll invite me to the next party
Dude, the worst part is I can't even pretend it didn't happen because she posted a video of it on Facebook.
would it be awkward if i bring my husband?
only if i fuck you in the bathroom while he's paying the check
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