k so who do I think I'm kidding applying to culinary school? I just fucked up a microwaveable pizza
i just threw up ON my final. epic way to end the semester.
today he pulled me aside to show me a lawn mower that he drew above his pubes. I saw his pubes in all their glory. Right there. In spanish class. Hola.
If I was there, I'd make you a vicodin spiked sandwich.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm sorry I tried putting my balls in your cup holder.
i look like a southern belle. however, i am around a million kegs. so i will be a southern shitshow.
I did the walk of shame wearing his scrubs. Fucking med school students is the way to go.
I have reached the point in my life where I realized this is what I'm going to do for the rest of my life. Eat, shit , bar, drink, drank, drunk.
We watched Jurassic Park and they made me drink every time they saw or named a dinosaur. Do you know how many dinosaurs live in Jurassic Park? Lots.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Nothing says thanksgiving like acid flashbacks
Met Dan at the park for lunch and the guy parked next to us was getting a BJ the entire time. Way to make me feel like an inadequate girlfriend, random park skank. All Dan got was a double cheeseburger and a large iced tea...
I woke up with your vibrator in my face
I just ate your leftovers whilst watching Garfield and Friends. Thank you across the board.
YOLO is a great motto until you end up with Chlamydia
it's 1:30pm and i'm eating cheese while i sext. i need hobbies
Randomize