Deffinety need to stop having sex on the beach just took a dump and it was mostly sand
Some dude at the gas station right now is buying a 30 rack of beast and a can of cat food. Happy Thanksgiving.
Revenge fucks should not count towards the total number. They're justified.
Two girls are doing the worm relatively well on the bar floor after the fact I just saw one puke in the trash
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
As i lay in bed, clutching my face, i'm starting to believe your dick in my eye story.
I needed to do something spontaneous, and since no one had coke this was the next best thing.
You're tall, so I have high hopes for your dick.
I need Jameson.
Yea? How do you think I feel? Your job during the delivery is to keep that flask ready. The moment our kid pops out, I'm taking a shot.
the dj asked me quote "are you sure you're sober enough to do this?" And I grabbed the mic from him and said "ill fucking show you sober- HIT IT". I also dropped the mic at the end so he had to come around and pick it up
Shania Twain would have been proud
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Dude of course I want to. Your penis is beautiful.
It might be whiskey, but I view Marge and Homer Simpson as something to strive for
Yeah, last night in the parking lot was hot. I'm sure whoever has the surveillance tapes thinks so too.
She shows up drunk at 3am for sex and then punches me straight in the eye in the middle of it because "you're too nice."
wait you like me?? for my personality??
I know I was surprised too
I had sex while watching Lord of the Rings last night. I think I just reached a new level of nerd.
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