How is your vagina???
Double booked
With your butt?
Totes, candlesticks and all
Yay!!
i was hoping the water fountain would somehow shoot out vodka this morning
Ed hardy stationary at walmart. I'm betting snookie wishes she knew how to write
all of your clothes are in the front law. btw..sprinklers go on in 20 minutes
Call 911 I'm faking my own death so this fat chick leaves my room
it's been a while because I don't count the hooker
Received a verbal warning at work for "riding in a trash receptacle, violating professionalism & infection control."
You can't buy drugs with a ziplock bag full of quarters, chuck-e-cheese coins, and a starbucks giftcard.
watch me
Ive only seen a dude masterbate on a train twice, once on the Jtrain and once on the Ftrain... trust me you never wanna see where the subway turns around.
I keep telling myself that if Britney can make it through 2007, I can make it through this date.
Please just fuck her. She's new to LA and doesn't know anyone nice.
Take off your clothes and see if he wants to have sex, that's a good way to find out
Kelly and I just had sex, and you didn't call or text to interrupt, are you alive? We are both concerned.
Chick in the kitchen making breakfast.. Yours or mine?
oh, he’s out of jail btw. as of about 6pm. one of his customers bonded him out apparently lol
Like he really got a coke fiend to bond him out?
Randomize
