just wrote on a church. and then stalked a boy, by the way, i fucked him. him being your friend, also, love tacos.
Evryone should know as good ramen noodle cooked in beer sounds... its not
I knew something was wrong when santa got arrested
you were so drunk when the pizza guy got there you told him that you didn't have any money and would trade him the pizza for 3 Porno movies and he totally did it. I may never have to pay for pizza again
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Your therapist is not going to think that you using your vagina as revenge is okay
I got laid and laid off at a conference in long beach all on the same day
Eh. They balance each other out
Hot Italian guy literally came into my logic class just to get my number to study with me and left. America.
It's hard to judge what a reasonable amount of cereal looks like in the spaghetti pot. We're out of cap'n crunch and milk.
I still can't believe that I ate McDonald's off of my chest in his bed...
Cross faded me is not the classiest.
No not at all haha I wish there was a picture of that
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Then he rubbed shampoo all over my arm and shouted, "Garnier FUCK THIS."
I smoked then listened to a voicemail from my mom...I ended up yelling at my phone cause she wasn't answering me. Forgot it was a recording.
Haha. I have resting bitch face. He has I want y'all to die face. It's a subtle difference
I'm a stupid stupid woman who is totally going to rock this holiday season dick drunk on that Ginger
I text the word "masturbation" so much, all it only takes my iPhone to auto-spell it is for me to type "mas".
Stop trying to mix nacho cheese and sex. Guys don’t want hot cheese near their junk. Pick a better fetish
Randomize