Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(636): View more from Missouri

I have funfetti in my underwear...will you come get me?

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(864): View more from South Carolina

bitch asked me if i cared if she kept her snuggie on while we had sex

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(412): View more from Pennsylvania

the girl next to me just texted someone in her phone named Optimus Prime

(724): View more from Pennsylvania

...i wonder what he did to earn that nickname

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(217): View more from Illinois

you kept yelling at her to "show me your genitals" until the bouncers told us to leave...at which point you showed them YOUR genitals...

(1-217): View more from Illinois

please don't ever take me to a strip club again...

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19 Characteristics That Make People Instantly Attractive
Read it at the TFLN blog
(781): View more from Massachusetts

I'm pretty sure I saw a man standing on a table with no shirt on getting sugar thrown at him while "pour some sugar on me" blaring while the cops were in the house.

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(605): View more from South Dakota

Can you give me a hickey quick? Im going to a white trash themed party. Completely serious

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(402): View more from Nebraska

I used the lotion his mom gave me for christmas to give him a hand job. It felt so wrong.

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(214): View more from Texas

On the way home there was a guy passed out IN the road on Colfax with his pants around his ankles, completely bare assed. If he was dressed as a speed bump, he succeeded.

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(260): View more from Indiana

Its my nipple ring piercing anniversary. We need to celebrate.

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