But honestly u used to be a cool guy and lately uve been superame(734): Superlame
I just found a frying pan...in my bed.
she looked like the bat from fern gully.
babies were throwing up all over the place
Do you think anyone has ever tried to have sex with a cows udder before?
Going to eat lunch. Bunch of people in church clothes, and we are hungover, wearing pajamas, and in real danger of puking on the floor. We're about to destroy the ambience of this joint.
Once he past out I measured his penis with my remote.
He is the blood diamond of hook ups. You think you want it...but you don't
She keeps asking if I've seen him... For the last time YES... IN MY BED LAST FRIDAY NIGHT AND THEN AGAIN SATURDAY MORNING
The guy next to me just said he wont play beer pong on principle. Im scared.
Just made out with the guy who gave me my tour. Full circle college win.
I'm now having weird sexual fantasies about that riverdancing figure skater. So thanks for that.
I knew deleting his texts was a bad idea and I was right. I just used the last time we talked to help me figure out when I had my last period
If you're wondering about the mess, we had sex in the kitchen. There was noodles involved.
Putting plan B on my parents credit card wasn't the smartest idea
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