So would u like to explain why you ate all my pickels and took my 1800?
About that, i have your 1800 on my desk with intentions of returning it but theres nothing i can do about the pickels
One of my residents in my hall just found my positive pregnancy test from last year I hid behind the fridge, I'm just going to tell them it was for a science project.
i just googled the alphabet. i couldnt remember if it was jklomnop or jklmnop.
A few things for you to consider: 1. Drunk enough that I'm looking up the dictionary definition of Wish. 2. Dictionary.com has new features. 3. Windows is offering me 500 business cards for 5 bucks. 4. I've always wanted a card that says I'm a ninja
I hope this adventure ends at a hospital
Housing is going to charge us for any broken dishes/glassware. Steal as many glasses as you can from the bars tonight. I got the baking dish and 3 plates covered.
Just blew a perc off the traytable on my flight, spring break has begun!!
you think that next time i come over to do this you can pick up the condom wrappers you used on the other girls
I was high and he had on a gorilla suit. Of course I had to take a picture with him
Your a disgrace to smokers everywhere
Not sure I just ate a really big pot brownie, I feel like my future is uncertain
I am far too hungover to deal with the fact I can hear you masturbating in the bathroom.
He was running late for work this morning, so I helped him out by finding a matching pair of black socks. And I hated it. So I'm currently drinking and reminding myself of the reasons I will never get married.
Goodbye spring break, hello depressing video on AIDS.
Ah, drunk me ordered sushi at 3 a.m. for sober me's lunch the next day. EXCELLENT
Give me 20 minutes.. I'm going to need to start off with an orgasm to get through this day
Randomize
