I just got back to Nicks and I shoul dnot have drank this much when I have to work at 7AM!!!!!
idk why but i just wanna to have sex with the idea of him. i don't even wanna meet him.
you're bored at work aren't you?
I'm toying with the idea of beating off under my desk
I knew her barely 30 minutes before we got naked. This whole fraternity thing is starting to grow on me...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm guessing "whatever I can get" wasn't the reply the nurse wanted when asking what med I need. Oh, and asked for a cartoon band-aid.
just to let you know its hard to talk to your father while being fingered up against a car..
FYI: telling a guy his dick is more impressive than you remembered it - they don't take it as a compliment.
It's called the dick transitive property. It states if you touch a person whilst they touch a dick, you are also touching said dick.
Did we pole dance in front of my boss last night or was it just me?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The internet is out at West Chester so I'm masturbating using my imagination. What is this, the fucking dark ages?
Dude...I slept walked to the free condom bin in the lounge last night. I don't know why.
I found a video of us drunkenly yelling "we wanna be the Pope" as we passed around the blunt
No one needs to know about the barren wasteland that is my vag. Sometimes i visualize my cervix rocking back and forth wondering where everybody went.
I just pictured that. It's reading a book.
I don't know how I got home but I'm pretty sure the guy in my closet had something to do with it
How’d it go?
I accidentally joined a cult
So not great...
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