I guess there's a 50 percent chance that it was her that wet my bed.
Yes because finding a guy to give head to is pretty difficult.
I mean not really
Obviously that's why it was a joke you are so stupid it's impossible.
I wanna get so fucked up that I try to catch a coyote in a pillowcase, breakdance fight a lion, and send back some toast at Denny's when I see its slightly burnt.
I have a drunk 6th sense to lyrics of songs i dont know. It only works when i dance..
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We just used hot candle wax from our joint lighting candle to make a bunch of new small ones how stoned are we
You yelled "bananas are an excellent source of pottasium!"4 times in the middle of class. how do you not remember?
I don't even know what potassium is.
So you actually don't remember giving head to the Neil Armstrong statue last night?
Don't judge me. If you're going to fall off a bed you might as well do it gracefully into a bag full of beer.
Come down. You're the next contestant on this bowl.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I asked for my Beats earbuds back and he sent me a pic of them tied around his penis. Now I miss both my great ear buds and his great dick
Did you take the bag w/your drugs & cookie cutter?
Nothing says "single girl" quite like Pinot Grigio and canned ravioli at 11:30 pm....
who says I'm not relevant to the kids today? Just had snapchat sex, blows the roof off aim cyber sex
So I almost broadcasted the porn from my phone to the boardroom chrome cast
I I was gonna wake him up with a blow job but I don't know how he would feel about it.
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