i know ur right I'm sorry I'm stupid and incompitent look I can't even spell incompetent right! Fuck!
im giving 12 year olds life advice. this is probably illegal somewhere.
yeah, you were trying to hump the doorman.
when did we get a doorman?
we were also in the wrong building...
I almost punched the night nurse in her face. I woke up and she was standing over me.
I dont know, but the way you were flopping around and gurgling made me scared that you were actually drowning in the carpet.
Last thing i remember is pounding jager and puking in that nerds george foreman grill. Then i wake up this morning with some random tooth brush in my mouth
So I walk in and he's teaching someone in London via Skype how to roll a blunt. I have new found respect for him.
And. I know i am a gay man cause when i saw the pic of his cock his feet were in it and i am like what the fuck?
It's not a real holiday until someone pees on you. Did someone pee on you?
I'm home, and it turns out she didn't get it all. still picking Oreos out of my pubes.
I am seriously only coming over if there are McNuggets. I want 10 bitch. Honey mustard.
I talked to the pizza guy for 10 minutes about my truck, I don't even have a truck
We met up and made out in front of an empanada spot, if that's not romance then idk what is.
Not sure what happened last night, but I woke up without a shirt on and cereal glued to my boobs...
I know you’re not my dad, but you’re someone’s dad. You’re also like a second dad to me as well. And one who I send nudes to as well. Happy Father’s Day
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