I can't remember if we talked about feelings. Fuck you Miller High Life.
i have a strong urge to join the asians in the park doing tai chi. I think im still high .
i'd rather walk the sahara in a snuggie with no water than take a bicycle cab
CAN CRIS ANGEL JUST LOOK NORMAL FOR ONCE?!
Just got to costco. Where are you?
Liquor aisle, bring another cart.
Who was that guy I met at your brother's house who had to get stitches in his ass?
The last thing I remember is trying to split my bridesmaid dress down the back like the incredible hulk.
and you succeeded.
The vagina on Hilton Head is mighty fine this time of year.
I'm thinking he has to buy me dinner at least twice before i even start considering casting him for "Fuck buddy - understudy."
you'll be horrified to know he's visiting next weekend
You two are a rollercoaster of sex and silence.
Last thing I remember is beer bonging sangria. Dear God.
Just ate Panda Express. Fortune cookie had no fortune in it. I actually prefer this. Less broken dream potential.
You stared at a Swedish dude for like 5 minutes then asked him "shouldn't you be yelling at dragons"
Please tell me I did not drink enough whiskey to think that having sex with my boyfriend while his best friend was on the floor next to us was a good idea.
On a side note. I slept with a stuffed giraffe last night. Found it in my bed when I came home and snuggled with it. Drunk me reverted to being 2
Randomize
