i have it on good authority that she is not as good at giving head as she claims she is
Some guy on the train just glared at me. So I'm drinking tequilla out of a dixie cup. Go fuck yourself.
New dating criteria: what kind of ex will this person be?
I've only been here for an hour and I've already made 6 babies cry.
Happy Birthday
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
...just for future reference, one Four Loko can fits PERFECTLY in a venti iced coffee cup from Starbucks
I think ppl see us as an unstoppable drunken force
Just found a bottle of tequila in the washer.
Recycling day makes me feel more like an alcoholic than regular days.
He's texting from midnight mass asking for nude pics. Baby Jesus is spinning in his manger as we speak
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Someone with the Instagram name "hymenbreaker" just liked a photo of me and my grandma. I feel ashamed.
It could be worse. I was dumped by a guy in a kilt after he gave my shoes away on St. Patrick's Day.
Dude Carly, it's like, inconvinent how often you cause me to have an erection
She had pubes that could make an episode of Duck Dynasty. Fear the Vag Beard
having flashbacks of licking salt of your dick for my shot of tequila
I support your vibrator fueled lifestyle.
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