I want 2 things right now, you or a cig
cig
Well how sick are u. Ive got a good immune system.
I can only name 15 people I've had sex with - can I just start claiming that as my sex number?
I apparently took a 45 minute shower, and became best friends with his mom.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She played chubby bunny with our cocks.. She got 4
I got kicked out of an open bar wedding reception. The bride "felt threatened" by my presence. Not my fault she's ugly
Let's have a moment of silence for the guinea pig that drunk chick threw out our window.
please hold off on going into labor, i might need you to take me to the free clinic
Hey, I took a sweater from your house. And, um, your little brother's virginity.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You drunkenly hook up with 5 people in one night and suddenly everyone tries to party with you.
I just saw my 7th grade teacher at the club. We had a pretty good talk over drinks. Turns out we both like dancing on tables.
so in addition to the two guys I slept with last night, and the third that I turned down this morning, a fourth has appeared. best Valentine's Day ever.
Doing blow in the bathroom isnt the same without you
Do a rail off the baby station in my honor
Like, I don't need to know your life dude. I just need you to suck my tits.
Dude I turned down free booze. I think I'm growing as a person.
Randomize