Weren't you self-described as an 'arab' slut?
No?
Well my cheeks are red now
Yeah, we realized keeping you in a cage wasn't beneficial to us
some girl in front of me in class just googled "hungover+throwing up blood"
What is the pluralization of human? I just got humen rejected, and I am going completely blank...
i finally watched harry potter... a tad unrealistic if you ask me... i mean a ginger kid with 2 friends?
I found the other part of your tooth if you want to put it under your pillow
He gets creativity points for the hot sauce. But it may be awhile until my nipples forgive him
Spent the entire ride home from downtown trying to convince designated dawgs to drop us off at waffle house instead of our apartment. i told them it was my house...they didn't buy it.
There is nothing more demoralizing than exchanging 150 dollar Christmas gifts with a girl your not sleeping with
Welp, dad and I drunkenly sang Christmas carols until the police told us to stop. I vote Xmas eve a success
I want to preface this by saying nothing happened, nothing is on fire. It is mere speculation. Do we have a fire extinguisher?
That edible kicked in right as I was upside-down on that rollercoaster. Fucking.mind.blown.
Just jacked in the family restroom in the hospital while eating beef jerky and looking at reddit gone wild.
Not a problem, sailor. I speak both autocorrect and typo.
Had sex on the beach last night with a drug dealer. win-win-win situation
Randomize
