awww and there was just a proposal on stage with the pussycat dolls !!!!!
Did someone propose they get off the stage?
we both passed out while playing beer pong, woke up in the morning and continued to play coffee pong to cure our hangovers
By the end of the second bowl I was making sound effects to every hand movement he made.
You kept calling me your small dog last night.
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but he used his one phone call to call mom and wish her happy mothers day, that's gotta count for somethin
I need to hang out with girls who make more mistakes
At one point I was double fisting both beer & ice cream. I love public events in this town.
she said my body looked tiny like it was a bad thing and then didn't even mention how great my tits look. it's like we're not even friends.
I can't help but be optimistic. I'm like a ball of slutty sunshine.
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We're all in the kiddie pool on the porch. Fully clothed. Watching porn. With my manager.
I was wearing my get used bookstore shirt when we fucked. Ironic yet appropriate.
Good morning! So would you prefer me to show up kind of late or on time but looking like I got chewed up and spat out by an episode of Buffy the Vampire Slayer?
She dresses like Bruce Banner and fucks like the Hulk. She is all of my lesbian fantasies come true.
See if shell let you call her dr banner in bed
I looked into this "it's just lunch" matchmaker thing and it was like 5 grand. If I'm gonna spend five grand I'll throw in another three and get new tits and find my own fucking husband.
we finally found him at 2 am. he was 3 miles from the house and tried running into the lake when he saw us pull up. i don't think he'll be taking ecstacy again any time soon.
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