you kept telling everyone that you were the mayor of silverware town
It's like having an annoying little brother who wants to have sex with you
all i know is that they all tuched my pee cup last night.
All I've accomplished this quarter is making Uno an acceptable drinking game.
I found a picture of my kindergarten class. Now you can see whose peer pressure I succumbed to.
ah. the first shower back home is like a baptism from the sins of the past year
I'm sorry about your car but on a brighter note I did wake up in my dorm. That's something right?
Fuck you.
Been home for 3 days and already spiked coffee with Kahlua. Only 106 till we go back to school
THE MIME IS MIMING TO BUST A MOVE KARAOKE. ALL MIME-RELATED EVENTS DESERVE CAPS LOCK
His cuteness will no longer contol my vagina
how do you play pong handcuffed?
Living alone for four weeks has given me unrealistic expectations of pantslessness.
I told my mom that I was just gonna go check the mail. It's been 19 hours, and I woke up in a hot tub covered in chocolate, with a text from her sayin "have fun sweetie"
Okay, but that still doesn't explain all the glitter in my puke.
My boyfriend's mom is the manager of Wendy's. The same one I took a pregnancy test in.
Randomize
